Here’s how you give feedback in a way people will listen.  You give them a feedback sandwich.  Positive affirmation.  Constructive criticism.  Positive affirmation.

This is how Jesus does it in the Book of Revelation.  When Jesus addresses each church he begins with affirmation.  Then Jesus calls for specific repentance.  Then he ends with a great promise.   Jesus models the feedback sandwich. 

Positive affirmation.  Constructive criticism.  Positive affirmation.  That’s the feedback sandwich.  That’s HOW we give feedback to one another.  We’re simply following Jesus model.

But WHY do we give feedback in this way?

We give feedback in this manner because it reflects reality.  Nothing we do is so bad we can’t affirm something.  Nothing we do is so good we can’t critique anything.  So any honest feedback will have both “Well Dones!” and “This Could Be Better”. 

We give feedback in this manner because it challenges the speaker.  Some people have trouble affirming anything.  These people need to learn to affirm.  You can always affirm something.  Other people have trouble critiquing anything.  These people need to learn how to give constructive criticism.  We can always improve in some way.

We give feedback in this manner because it challenges the listener.  Some people have trouble hearing affirmation.  Affirmation makes them uncomfortable.  They need to learn how to accept affirmation.  Other people have trouble hearing criticism.  Criticism makes them angry.  They need to learn how to accept criticism

We give feedback in this manner because it reflects the gospel.  The first and last words are positive.  The first and last words are affirming.  The first and last words are good news.

So start handing out those feedback sandwiches!